Waiting for Willmael Delgado

I write because this is the closes thing to communicate with you and express how deeply you are love, miss and remember by Mother and family. because I have to let out this feelings, because you have to know how much you mean to me, how much I regret taken the decisions I toke. I don't know if you have seen this but i do know Your grandmother have knowledge of this this is according to her  friends commenting( I think is her narcissistic self i know she likes to look for me in the social media) but she know and i know she likes to put me down with her narcissistic methods you know she is perfect devoted and no one else is lol but if you ever wonder let me know i can prove myself  i'm not scare of doing so. I also know how much she loves control so i know unless  a friend tell you and you find ways to see this away from her watchful eyes like she does you can email me at Dulcemaru79@gmail.com so we can meet ...

I have been sitting in front of the computer for minutes looking outside the widow seen the know fall slow coming down. The small pound all in white at the back of the house with out no ducks or quack quack like your little sister  like to call them,thinking how to start today's blog. She comes next to me and say mami wake up where is your mind,I look at her at only 3 years old she knows that there is moments where my mind is gone to where ever you are, wondering how are you feeling today?, wondering how you doing in school?. What you like to do in your free time? or who are you as an individual?.How you life is been? and where is going? I hope that your hearth is in the right place and in every mistake you make you learn that one that mistake is done there is not take back but there is moving forward in how to make it right.  we won't be human if we don't make any mistakes. I hope to that you developed empathy toward other people feelings, sometimes you have to wear this ...

I woke up up shaking up upset with teary eyes from a nightmare because this is not a dream. In my dream in my house your grandmother, her husband and you where having this meeting with this group of people don't know what is was beings said by your grandma but she was on front of the group her husband out back and you and this people on the chairs listening to what ever she had to say in the back of the kitchen the calendar that  I cross everyday wish  I keep looking on to and your grandmother husband just looking at me like my near existence bother him. Then you get up from the crowd and come at me to talk to me, you tell me how you hate me and how I was not there for you, how I left you I got down to your eye level and said to you, is that how you where toll all this happens, is that what you think I did, you go back and tell them they are not going to use you to hurt me anymore, that everything that comes from your mouth are words and thoughts they put in there. I will sh...

I'm going to smile live remember you and wait for you because you are one of the reasons I live for I love you more than you know.....                                                                                   love mom

In the dream some was looking for you It look  like a field trip or something that when wrong I remember saying I don't care I have to go so I when there I waited for a long time and you where one of the very last found I remember looking but no one was there but me you ran and hug me and said mom I hug you and kiss you and it was like an unspoken understanding moment when we knew we wanted this we have miss this but we where not longer afraid of consequences we where free to be mother and child I was sad to have woken up I was hugging you so much  I love when I dream of you but this dream was one of the best all I had but I wish nothing ever like that happens to you, but you the part where we cut be close again well that can happen whenever you are ready I be here for when that happen.                 Love mom

Waiting for you Willmael Delgado : a brand new year with new hopes : This year I have made me a promise to you and me. In this new year is the year where I will like to work in forgiving myself because for ye...

This year I have made me a promise to you and me. In this new year is the year where I will like to work in forgiving myself because for years I have felt guilty for giving custody to your paternal grandmother this is been a heavy weight in my heart that I have been carrying around for years there will be no longer that filling hunting me and my promise to you to work in whatever I have done wrong that have make you feel uncomfortable  and distance from me I just wish you will tell me what went wrong so I can make it better maybe if you tell me what's your point of view help me see what wrong and to fix it. I have one wish I wish you remember my me my actions my gestures when we spend time together forget about what people said and remember my actions in those brief moments that We had and I hope that the future We can be what We are mother and child I hope  that in the future We can be that without no fear  1 Cori...